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706th Week: Living With “Wide Open Eyes
As a general practice, I spend time each morning looking at videos, interviews, and professional talks that support a positive sense of connection and wholeness. Beginning each day orients me to a perspective and sense of being that colors my day with a quality that nourishes my body and soul. During one of these forays into cyberspace, I ran across an article, which touched me with its emphasis on a more mystical sense of our world.
The author, Michael Edwards, says the following: “…spirituality can give us an actual experience of the unity of all things. This experience, when nurtured as a constant practice, roots quality-consciousness, non-discrimination, non-violence and reverence for all people and the earth deep into our core.” Read More “706th Week: Living With “Wide Open Eyes”
Week 665: Rediscovering Curiosity
Recently, I saw a clip from Fox News that got me to thinking about how many of us now engage conversations not to understand one another but to convince or to show that we are “right”. Read More “Week 665: Rediscovering Curiosity”

812th Week: Managing Uncertainty
One of the things that most of us find challenging is to manage uncertainty. It’s a natural response to be uncomfortable with not knowing what’s going to happen next or where we are headed, individually and collectively. For some people, finding conspiracy theories offers an experience of “knowing what’s going on” that calms the discomfort most of us feel around uncertainly. For others, anxiety becomes a constant companion and they have difficulty truly soothing themselves. For yet others, becoming numb and shutting down is their natural response to constant and mounting uncertainty.
Also, I want to affirm that having a response to uncertainty is certainly normal and not necessarily something that needs the kind of process I’ll describe below, so please be gentle with yourself when circumstances elicit discomfort and anxiety about the future.
As I’ve been thinking about how we can expand our capacity to be uncomfortable and find some degree of equanimity, I found myself thinking about a concept I have taught for many years—a process of uncoupling trauma-based associations, called over-couplings in the Somatic Experiencing® world. Let me define these terms as I did when teaching SE.
Trauma over-couplings are associations that become “glued together” during times of overwhelm or distress. These are individual elements of experience or learnings that actually don’t belong together. One common trauma-based, attachment-oriented over-coupling is: If I do what I want, they (whoever “they” might be) won’t love me. Those two things don’t really belong together and especially so in adult life. Another common trauma-based over-coupling is: Unless I know what’s going on, I won’t be safe. The problem with trauma-based over-couplings is that they predict something that may not, or probably won’t, happen. They often arise from childhood experiences where we were not only ill equipped to have options available to us but when we also weren’t mature enough to understand what was happening.
I’d like to offer one way to deal with these trauma-based over-couplings. I called it “therapeutic dissociation” in my book, Getting Through the Day, but it’s actually a form of uncoupling adult awareness and options from those arising from earlier overwhelming experience.
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785th Week: Cultivating A Sense of “Earth Kin”
Walking across Central Park on the morning I go to my office to water plants and pick up mail, I was struck—as I always am—by the return of the green. All over the park, many trees are putting out leaves, others are laden with beautiful flowers, bushes are filling out with their green garb. The main feeling of it all is an expression of the abundant presence of life, of the intelligence and vibrant expression of Nature’s intelligence and creativity.
As I took in the beauty all around me, I was reminded, powerfully, that this beautiful planet doesn’t need us, but we cannot survive without its gifts. We and all our earth kin are part of a complex ecology that many of us have studied for years and yet, collectively, many of our human kin somehow haven’t taken in or taken seriously this fact of our planetary life. With Covid-19 now a painful and challenging reality, and with the worldwide halt in our usual activities, we vividly see the impact we have had on our environment. Skies have cleared. Mountains hidden from view for decades now stand out clearly in the landscape. Waterways are clearing and wildlife is returning to areas previously avoided because of human activity. Even as we see how resilient and stunningly responsive the planet is when we stop polluting as we have been doing for so long now, I find myself wondering how many of us will remember this and commit to finding new ways to go forward.
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849th Week: Choosing Kindness
For the past few days, as I’ve pondered what I wanted to share this week, the living presence of kindness kept coming into my awareness. I experience all the qualities of life to be expressions of frequencies, qualities that have, as their foundation, particular frequencies with which we resonate.
Listening to the news these days, one of the qualities that seems to be in short supply in the news reports we hear about is kindness. I’m sure that there are countless acts of kindness happening every day, but we don’t tend to hear about them. This got me to thinking about the importance of choosing to resonate with, and express, the qualities and frequency of kindness.
I’ve no doubt shared before one of the experiences I had with frequencies that convinced me of the power and efficacy of choosing to resonate with chosen qualities. When my sister and I used to take our mother out for a day’s activities, I began those mornings with my usual attunement/meditation time and, as an additional piece, I asked the Spirit of Affection to fill me with its essence, its frequency, all day long. On those days, I found that I was much more patient and attentive to my mother in even more positive ways and the experience oriented me to a practice of choosing frequencies with which to resonate in various situations and contexts.
You may notice that I think of these frequencies as embodied Spirits, such as the Spirit of Ease, the Spirit of Comfort, the Spirit of Love, etc. You can just as easily think of them as archetypes or energy patterns. Or, you can simply think of them as qualities that are available to us at any time. Whatever works best for you is all that matters, so take a moment to touch into what is, for you, the most comfortable way to think about accessing frequencies—qualities of being and expression.
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