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677th Week: Nurturing Mutual Empowerment
In my years of teaching about trauma resolution, I’ve drawn on something one of my dear friends and teachers, Diane Heller, taught me many years ago. It was the distinction between a power model that encompasses only two options—power over or overpowered—and a mutual empowerment model that says one person’s power in no way diminishes the power of anyone else. Since learning about this, I have done my best to interact with others from a mutual empowerment model.
I’ve also spent many years helping psychotherapy clients notice how comparing themselves to others almost always leads to suffering, as does the habit of taking things personally. Read More “677th Week: Nurturing Mutual Empowerment”

727th Week: Finding Inner Silence
Walking across Central Park one morning on my way to my office, I was aware of a cacophony of insect sounds all around me. It reminded me of when I lived in the Berkshires, where summer nights were filled with the songs of tree frogs and insects. Something about being enfolded in all that beautiful sound also reminded me of times I’ve been in landscapes with waterfalls, or near the ocean, where complete silence is never present, except in the momentary pause between waves on the shore.
As the enthusiastic insect songs accompanied me that particular morning, it got me to thinking about the place each of us has inside that embodies silence, no matter what may be going on around us. Our culture doesn’t tend to promote a conscious relationship with this aspect of ourselves, but deep inner quiet is always available somewhere deep inside each of us. Read More “727th Week: Finding Inner Silence”

876th Week: Exploring Optimal Futures
For many years, I’ve written and taught about the optimal future self and have seen what a powerful and useful resource it is. Recently, I began to think again about optimal futures, or each person’s optimal future, as another way to access possibilities and states of being that are positive and empowering.
One of the key elements in exploring and experiencing optimal futures or the optimal future self, is to keep preconceptions and assumptions out of the way and to be open to the unfolding experience arising from the intention we bring into the process. Intention is the rudder that orients us to the probability or probabilities that resonate with what our intention conveys.
As I’ve begun to offer this as a guided meditation to colleagues, I’ve discovered that there are many ways people experience their optimal future. The key thing is to generate the intention that orients the experience. For some people, there is a sudden thought or awareness that opens a new door of understanding. For others, there may be a symbol or image that conveys a new felt-sense experience or awareness in some way that offers a moment of inspiration. Another person connected with the essence of ease, a quality that she has had trouble accessing. Her body immediately filled with an experience of ease and she spent her meditation time soaking that in. For me, my first experience was of a wave washing over me, cleansing me of old habits and learnings. No doubt, the experience will be unique for each person.
As is true with the optimal future self work, what is important is the experience that arises, whether that experience is a flash of insight, connecting with a living image or frequency/essence, or some other awareness that arises. The key is to feel the experience, preferably in the body but that may not be the way it comes into awareness each time. Because of my background in Somatic Experiencing® and hypnosis, I encourage people to notice what sensations arise during these experiences when possible, and to take time to soak in those that are new and helpful to have.
Remember, as well, that we live in a world of infinite possibilities, so in this meditation you focus on what’s optimal for you. You don’t want just any old future. In this meditation, you seek to connect with your optimal future.
Read More “876th Week: Exploring Optimal Futures”